Compunction

Quite often in prayer or at mass when I think about God's great love  for us I am sad, for I can see how completely helpless I am to do anything good through my own will or strength.  When I compare myself to our Great God I find myself totally lacking.  Even in loving God I fail.  I came upon this paragraph on compunction in the introduction to Teresa of Avila's 'The Book of Her Life' and found some understanding and comfort in it.  Strange, isn't it, that in our society the word compunction is rarely used and usually devalued as a quality we should possess.

"Compunction is a basic sentiment running through the entire Life.  To the undiscerning or inexperienced, Teresa's outpourings of compunction might seem like exaggerated guilt feelings.  But for Teresa, true sorrow does not disquite, does not agitate.  Her compunction consoled her; permeated with humility, it was a gift-quiet, gentle, and in the light.  The Desert Fathers, in fact, constantly exhorted their disciples to pray for the gift of compunction, the gift of tears.  These Fathers felt that when the soul was softened by this interior weeping, God would five the experience of His light; in the shadow of sorrow was to be found the spiritual joy of enlightenment.  And so it was with Teresa.  In addition, her feelings of compunction later became more intense through the mystical experience she had of God's transcendent majesty, and of the shabbiness of sin beside His boundless outpouring love.  Spiritual humiliations preceded her spiritual exaltations.  "I don't recall His eer having granted me one of the very notable favors of which I shall speak if not at a time when I was brought to nothing at the sight of my wretchedness".

-The Collected Works of St. Teresa Of Avila, Volume One, The Book of Her Life